From Expectation to Inspiration

The call goes forth, 'go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And Surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.' ( Matt 28:19-20)
 The response is.... surely someone else will do it? I'm to busy planning my own life getting my goals achieved. Setting a life that is pleasing and fun. But is it really that, aren't you called for more, to do more, to search for more to discern more...?
There's got to be more to life then being happy, having the latest accessories, having a job you like. Something burns inside me for more, more love, more passion, more joy. But where do I attain it from where does it come from, will it even last?

John 4: 13-14 says "Jesus answered ' everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.' What is the water that God gives us? Is it not love? For it overflows from his heart to ours and spills out on to everyone we give it to. It's an overflowing fountain, never ending. Love, I thirst for it yet it overwhelms me, yet I want more. Mike Bickle in his teaching about the Song of Solomon, says this is love sickness. The Bridegroom is love sick for his bride, and we the bride should be love sick for our bridegroom. We must know him, and to know him in the Jewish context is to know someone intimately.
So I am on an adventure to seek after this love, to find it, to behold my husband Jesus, the one who showered me with kindness, love, affection, grace, the one who laid down his life for me. So that he as scripture says he will received the reward of his suffering; by walking in faith trusting that he is a safe God, that he is my provider, that he goes before me, he is right beside me.
 To trust this love that is eternal, that keeps flowing; fear grips me but I shake it off as I gaze at his beauty, the one who is found worthy. (Revelations 5:4-5)


'Go and make disciples'... what are disciples? People that follow a leader, learn from him walk like him, talk like him, reflect him. Oh to reflect the one my heart loves. We were made in the image of God in his likeness we were created. So how does it happened? What makes me be like him? He has called me a daughter of God, a royal priest, his beloved one. These are whom he my lover says I am, so what does it look like to be a daughter of God, a royal priest, his beloved? I don't rightly know but I'm willing to take the chance to find out, because the burning inside me longs to find something new, something overwhelming. Something so deep it hurts but fulfills me to the core. So as I go to the secret place my heart ponders what he will say to me, what will he want to talk about anything or just behold the beauty that I have gleaned from him?

The great commission as it is now called may seem like an expectation Jesus said to do... but he calls us to be His Sons and Daughters to be the people that he has called us to be. And in doing this we will be doing the great commission. Because it won't be out of obligation but love. Love for our father, our Bridegroom, love for the one our hearts yearn for. So ponder for a while and think about what you do and ask yourself are you being who you have been called?

Do you know the way you move me?

Do you not know that when you look to God, when you seek him out he is so ravished by you, when you say yes to God and no to the things of this world his heart is moved? Our human brains can't really understand that a God who is Almighty, All Powerful, All Worthy of Worship is moved he is overcome with emotions for you. Jesus is captivated by you.

Think about something that pleases you, like maybe a song, or a movie with significant power, it moves your heart to help or learn more about the history of it. Like Goodbye Bafana. It’s the story about Nelson Mandela and the hardships and joys of his life. And even to this day we remember what he did. It moves your heart and pulls on your heart strings, to reach out to those in need, those that are being mistreated, and those whom have been misjudged. Times your emotion by a 1000% and this is how God feels for you. It’s quite uncomprehendable, but who are we to not let God have these feelings towards us!

God wants to share his love that is why he created us, that is why he sent his Son to die for us so that the relationship could be restored. That he would be able to share his affections towards us.

Something to mediate on and encourage us is this: ‘The day we were born into sin has been concurred, because of what Christ did, so we are now not the person the world claims us to be or says we are. But we walk now in who we were made to be, from the beginning. We walk out something’s that might seem hard but we need to keep the focus on we are concurs"

Jesus feels about you how the father feels about him, such immense love, such intense and satisfying love. We need to renew our minds, to continue to fill it with the truths of who God says we are and how he feels about us.

"We destroy strongholds of the mind; which are a collection of thoughts/lies that are in agreement with the devil and not with God; by feeding our spirit and feasting on the truths of whom God is and who we are to God." We need to do this because it damages our intimacy with God. Because the truth sets you free and reveals us to the full knowledge of how God thinks of us.

When we can say oh God I see my weakness I see my struggle, and yet you love me, yet your heart is moved we start to understand grace, understand a bit of who God is. When you can get this when you can say Oh I'm dark I'm so full of sin but I'm lovely to you God, I am my beloveds and He is mine. Then you will be growing in love sickness for God. And when you are lovesick in the Kingdom you can also simultaneously be longing and thirsting for more of God. Even when he gives you his affections and they are overwhelming over powering and you feel you just can't handle them, you want more.

God wants a partner he wants to share his life with another, Just like we desire to share our lives with someone else, we long to express ourselves to someone in a way where we know they won't judge us wrongly, they will love us no matter what. I know for me I long for this I long to be loved by someone else and to share that back with them. To always journey with someone by my side, that knows what I do and knows who I am and can tell me when I forget who I am and to do it in return for them.

How I desire and long for intimacy with the Lord with someone else too, with my husband. I am lovesick for him. I want to be with him yet I will wait and spread my fragrance out to the world of the fruits he has planted in my garden.

God I pray you would give my love freely to others for the glory of Jesus whom has placed that love in me.I desire to give love back to God, to give him all of me. Voluntary love is when God comes into your garden and makes it His by YOUR invitation.

I pray this comforts your heart and encourages you to go deeper in the word to know for yourself the desires and thoughts God has for you.

Blessings to you

Renee 

Remembering the old to press on in the future

Remembering the years gone by, the times where there was much joy in my life, helps me see my situation of sadness as something that, with God's love I can press on. Lately I have been working quite a lot at Coffee Club doing dishes and serving customers. I have also been emailing students for the next school making sure they have all the things that they need to come. This has all caused me to be quite tired, especially after last Sunday (Mother's Day) we were so busy that basically everyone that worked at Coffee Club was there working. It was a blast and lots of fun, and well organised. I'm so grateful to have a job, that God has blessed me with the skills to work in hospitality and make other peoples days better. But to be honest when I get tired my shield and strength starts to fail and negative thoughts come in and I feel like I don't have the strength to fight the lies that the devil throws at me, So some prayer would be lovely please.

I'm reading a book at the moment called 'A meal with Jesus' by Tim Chester. It's really amazing to read how God spoke things, he fulfilled them through Jesus and also showed in part what the Kingdom of Heaven will be like with its feasts. Did you know that the feeding of the 5000 is a foretaste into how God will prepare for us a banquet in Isaiah 25:6-7 God says "on this mountain the Lord  of hosts will make for all people a feast of rich food...." You may know this as the Messianic Banquet of the one that God will have when we get to the new age the new kingdom. It's true and God showed us a little bit of how it will work with the feeding of the 5000. Cool ae there is also an amazing quote by Simon Carey Holt "...Most of what you do as a community of hospitality will go unnoticed and unrecognised. At base, hospitality is about providing a space for God's spirit to move. Setting a table, cooking a meal, washing the dishes is the ministry of facilitation: providing a context in which people feel loved and welcome and where God's spirit can be at work in their lives. Hospitality is a very ordinary business, but in its ordinariness is its real worth." This makes me feel very privileged to be one who provides good hospitality, by inviting people and making them welcome and cooking for them. (even if I don't get to do it all the time) 

Anyway that's just a little up date on how I'm going and what I have been doing in the last couple weeks. I was reading my journal earlier today and came across something that I wanted to share with you. Back in February Hope Centre (the church I attend) held a conference and I got totally wreaked by the Holy Spirit, I loved it, God revealed to me a picture and the feeling of what it was like to be the prostitute caught in adultery.
 (John 8:1-11) She was thrown to the ground in front of Jesus with a crowd of abusers asking Jesus questions. I felt and saw Jesus just writing on the ground. I felt the insults, the threats, the discussion, the pain and intensity of shame. Oh I felt so vulnerable  so worthless. I had been caught in sin, and thrown at a man so worthy of condemning me. I dear not look up, but as my doubts started to fade in the moment, the fear lessoned as the voices disappeared. I looked up and heard a voice say "neither do I condemn you go now and leave your life of sin". Such hope and destiny were found in those words. A grace unconceivable by man, given only by one who could condemn but chose to love instead. WOW right, imagine yourself in that same position after you've done something wrong, no matter how bad, God forgives us he loves us so much that he forgives rather than condemns. Romans 8:1 says therefore there is now no condemnation. Praise God for this, that he came to give grace to lay down his life so that we might in his resurrection take up his life, to be with his father be with our father, our creator. It just blows my mind the intensity of God's love. There is hope for the hopeless, peace for the restless because of God's great love and mercy. I pray this encourages you to seek God even in your darkest moments.

In news about the internship I have applied for it and need to do auditions for it. I've already done it for singing which is good, but I'm praying about whether to do it for the guitar and the cello. I may just do both and see what they think. So would you please keep me in your prayers as I venture into a place of worship for 3 months, that God would meet me and encourage me and heal my broken heart.

I pray for you all that God would pour out blessings, and if I know of anything in particular that you need prayer for I will pray for that. If there is something in particular you want me to pray for you for please just email me and I will pray for you as you pray for me. 

God's abundant blessings be with you 

Much love 
Renee

Press on, press on press on they say..

"Were coming to a close for the time being, were resting in the presence of the Lord. Acknowledging him and gleaning from him the words that our hearts long for.

The battle of the mind its full of constant questions of analysing the truth from the lies. Time is needed time is forgotten, we must go on.

Press on press on press on they say, with a constant battle and a fight to be won. Remember the days, where joy was overflowing, and your heart was singing a song, to the creator God. Remember the days of old remember the days just gone, where your heart was full of love and gratefulness to the Lord. Look for the good things in the present day, think of these and move on.

The breakthrough is near the trumpet will be blown, victory is just around the corner. Press on press on press on they say. Stop the thoughts and adjust them, think about the good, think about who I say you are. For I have called you by name desert flower in the season of bloom, the fragrance is ready it has been infused. The colour has been chosen and seeps its way through, to the petals of your hearts garden.

The essence of who are you is starting to shine its starting to show from the inside out the beauty will be known."

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So to up date your all we are a few days away from sending 81 people to the nations to preach the love of the father and invite people into his family, Oh the joy of serving in this community even when the going gets tough. My mind says run away but my heart says I belong. So I stay and commit to being here for however long the Lord asks me. In July I will be setting my heart to focus on worship for a season. The house of prayer (T.H.O.P) is running for the first time a worship internship where we can grow and develop in our musical skills, while being mentored and stretched in our spiritual walk. Its a 3 month internship where we set our hearts to seek God's face to come before him like Mary and worship him at his feet, where we do Psalm 27 vs.4 "One thing I ask of the Lord this is what I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple." Also to fifull the call to the great south land of the Holy Spirit to make "...incense arise from the ends of the earth we will hear singing, glory to the righteous one." Isaiah 24 vs. 14-16.

http://www.thop.co.nz/worship-internship/

It also has an outreach phase where we travel around New Zealand to minister and awaken a sleeping bride to the love of the bridegroom. This is for a month, I am really expectant and excited about doing this and ask that you would pray that I would get all that God has for me in this season. That I will be honouring God myself and others in taking this step of faith to learn about worship.

here is something that I've been thinking about lately:
My heart is for the workplace and to see the kingdom culture being expressed in it. Especially in the hospitality industry. I'm sick of seeing people think a restaurant/cafe job is second rate or an easy way to get through college. Hospitality to me is a valued and important part of every culture and being at a table: develops fellowship and safety within that culture. Because food and enjoyment are a must and is something we need to develop, and hold as a high priority in our lives especially in these days, as there is so many evil things happening. The table is the place were the game face is removed, where opinions are valid. Where questions are asked and laughter is essential. Where we can commune with each other and express a different way of worship to God by being in unity while we nourish our bodies. (I'm still developing thoughts about the importance of the table, and what true hospitality means. I want to influence the people I work with so that they are getting excellence -means useful to God- and will see him by my hospitality- : The act or practice of one who is hospitable; reception and entertainment of strangers or guests without reward, or with kind and generous liberality. )

What else do you find valuable about coming to the table?

I'd love your feedback.

Oh the joy of knowing

  1/4/13

Oh the joy of knowing that my saviour loves me, that HE delights in me that when I said yes all was changed between us in an instant. How I long for my brain to catch up with my heart, in the joy of the knowledge of God and who HE says I am. How I long to forget the broken past I created for myself lonely and betrayed, desperate and rejected along the way to true freedom, true deliverance from my past, from my failings. Jesus has taken away my sins he has washed me clean by the cleansing blood, no longer do I Renee of this world live but I am a new creation a reborn creature loved, accepted acknowledged, freed from bondage and despair.

 How to forget the former things how to forget the ways I’ve walked, only by renewal of my heart, soul and mind can this be done. Oh that my redeemer would cleanse me again, renew the fire and soften my heart, help me to learn of the goodness of the Lord without fear without rejection or pretence. Oh I long for freedom like water to the barren body, like we wait for the coming of the Lord.

But today I stand and declare I will think of whatever is pure whatever is righteous, whatever  is good and noble and uplifts. Today I choose to put on the armour to shine my shield and strengthen my body for the fight, and we must be ready, for the time is drawing near when darkness will be so wicked and so defiled that there will only be little lights seen around the world. Where Christ’s saints will be singing a song that’s never been heard one that will rise from the great south land of the Holy Spirit one that will declare Glory to the righteous one, peace on earth and prosperity to mankind, Jesus let your name be lifted high let day and night intercession be evident in our lives. Your Kingdom come your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Extravagant Love

Friday the 29^th of March 2013 what a significant day for a lot of people in the community, as we do for most schools we set aside a day/ time where we come and bring our loaves and fishes for outreach fees, but this one was different this one was more sacrificial well for me anyway. People gave money, surf boards, computers, different things to help each other get to the places God was sending them to be missionaries; it’s just like in Acts when they gave all that they had, no one was in need, because the community was a giving generation. Remembering this reminds me of where we want to go where we want to take this community of Jesus Lovers to a place where God has a resting place where people feel safe and cared for. This is the community I live in one where we are kind to each other, we speak words of life and not death, we treat the different sexes with respect and honour; yes we make mistakes but we ask forgiveness. Oh what a blessing it is to be here. 

Sacrificial love was given like our rights to have something, we gave up our families our right to be married our dreams and things that were self-seeking. And Gods heart rejoiced over our love given back to him, for he is MOST worthy of ALL Praise. Psalm 45 vs. 10-11 says “listen O daughter consider and give ear: forget your people and your father’s house. The King is enthralled by your beauty; honour him for he is your Lord.” We studied this in worship with the Word on Thursday we need to let go of our former ways or own thought patterns, we have been accepted and adopted in to a new family Jesus’ family where there is a new way of living, We get to live in this Kingdom as Sons and Daughters, Princes, and Princesses, we need to learn the new way of the kingdom it is counter cultural to that of this world, where the last will be first and the first will be last, weaknesses can be used to show strength.

 I went forward and shared my heart that which the Lord had asked me to give up ‘my right to marry and my right to fulfil my own dreams without God in them’. I'm believing and growing in my faith that, that  which he has placed in my heart to fulfil will come to pass in HIS timing and by HIS will, and all things will be swept away that are not from him. It says in Zechariah 4:6 “not by might nor by power but by my spirit says the Lord.” After I did this and so many other people got up I felt such peace such freedom to do what God wanted me to do, what that is I don’t rightly know at this stage; but he is revealing to me his mysteries a little at a time. (as much as my character can handle without becoming prideful). I love God so much I will go where he sends me,  do what he asks me to do, speak to whom he wants me to speak too, oh the depths of my heart overflow with love for him. Bring on his Return.

Identity and Kingdom Culture

Orphans vs. Sons of God Sin created the orphan spirit when we chose to eat the apple in the Garden of Eden. So because of the orphan-ness of this world people try to be like God, to take his place in their lives as father, provider, saviour, King, carer, supreme ruler, authority and so much more. “Jesus did not consider equality with God something to be grasped.” (Phil 2 vs. 6) Yet he was God, but he came to show the way through humility and showing love to the least of these. How much more should we who are made up of many numbers (the church) be like Jesus in his servant hearted way. Even unto death he did ONLY what he saw the father doing and said what his father told him. He showed us what being a Son of God is. Ephesian 1 vs. 4-5 says “For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ in accordance with his pleasure and will” So we are made with a DNA that longs for unity, oneness with three parts to it, (our bodies, soul and spirit). So in connection with human beings we are created to be in relationship in three parts male, female and God. Man wasn’t lonely when he was in the garden he was alone which is different because God saw, that he in himself had three parts Father Son and Holy Spirit. Man had masculinity and feminity in him but there was still something missing. So God took from the male a part of the feminine make up and created female in human form. But they were both Adam, it wasn’t until they had both eaten from the apple that anything happened, and Eve wasn’t named until Adam rejected her as the woman and accused her of giving him the fruit. God was always meant to be in the picture of who we are part of our make up because we are created in his image and likeness. He is the author and creator of who we are. He knows our inner most being because created us he knows that you struggle with this or that, he knows you have sickness or get tired easily. He created you to reach out to him for wisdom and understand in how to live life his perfect way. Being given this revelation that we are sons and daughters of God knowing our original design gives fresh understanding and freedom from the lies that we are surrounded by. Coming into the light brings overwhelming love joy and peace, because it’s the truth and it sets you free. We need to keep reminding ourselves and each other of whose we are and what it means to be a son and daughter of God. Read scripture it describes who we are in Christ Jesus.

A culture of Honour and the meaning of a name. I have been pondering and been given revelation from my father in Heaven of the culture of the Kingdom and how we are meant to be “in this world but not of it” (Romans 12vs.2). We can practically apply the culture of the Kingdom by serving and loving others. For me I find the words we speak to be very important because they either bring life or death. That is all we do with our tongue up-lift or encourage or criticize and put down. Thus I am weary of what I say to people. While also wanting to help create an environment, a characteristic in the community I live in where ‘I love you’ is meant as brotherly and sisterly love. Where you are free to say ‘I love you’ and not be scarred that they may think you like them and want to marry them. To shake off the lies attached to God’s words. That religion has made nasty in our mouths. The other day I learnt what my full name meant and it’s surreal to think that when my parents first saw me they prophesied life over me, destiny over me. So my name is Renee—Born again. Elizabeth—God’s promise, I am God’s daughter. Anne- Grace and favour, prayer. Pearce—Rock. Amazing right? I feel these words are becoming fruition as I use the giftings and talents God has placed in me to excel in, and reap (which is my initials) the good harvest.